....Not like "A New Hope", that was a bullshit name for Star Wars, but more like, a clean piece of canvass....
Somehow I think that if I start a blog, one that no one really knows who is behind this blathering, or let's be honest, one that no one will read, I can start over every time the world takes a dump on my life.
It gets old on New Years Eve to say things to myself like, "Hey dude, it's a new year, time to start all over again, it's exciting!!!!", and then the following year you get divorced, loose all your friends due to said divorce, change jobs to try and make a difference in a homeless kids life but end up going broke in the process, your dad dies, and then your health starts to take a header because you have not had babies yet.
How do I start over? Again....for the 38th time?
Maybe writing anonymously to the universe, I will figure it out. I'm just some random, tattooed, woman that needs some guidance.....
I decided, starting today, that I will write once a day, and see how the year go's. It is always easy to remember the bad shit that happens, but not always the mundane or happy things. Don't get me wrong, I'm not some morose 18 year old here who's parents wont buy them a new iPhone...no, I'm an adult, who has somehow become quite cynical, and doesn't like it so much.
I'm, not all miss doom and gloom on the outside, but this is what rolls around in my brain at 1, 2, 3 o'clock in the morning....what am I doing right now?
I planted a vegetable garden for the first time with my boyfriend. I don't know what I would do without him sometimes....and every day when I get home, I look at the garden and hug him.
Right now we are getting ready to take our first road trip together....we were best friends for a while, then our friendship grew into sex, love, and everything in between. I know barf, right? But seriously, he is pretty rad. I don't know......something about the two of us, just clicked right.
So yeah, we are going to LA in 15 days, and he is going to see where I grew up, meet my oldest friends, and see where I would rather be. We live in the Pacific NW and I have begun to hate it here.....
Too much rain and gray sky...too many obnoxious yuppie-hipster-douche-bag-bigots....too many classicist jerks who try to act like they are down with oppression, even though they, themselves are oppressors. Sometimes I just need to go home. It's been long enough.......
So yeah, we are planning our route, where to camp, where to eat, and the thought of being in hot and stinky LA in 15 days, makes me smile like a big fat nerd.
